Articles by Maurice Turmel PhD on ArticleSnatch.com

Grief and Loss Overview

Tue, 23 Jun 2009 00:00:00 -0400

Grief and Loss Overview by Maurice Turmel PhD An overview of grief and loss shows us that this is a broad category of life experience. We usually associate it with death and dying, but it can include losing your employment and broken relationships as additional categories that generate the grief experience. Grief and loss comes in a multiplicity of dimensions that affect our daily lives. Losing a loved one is what we typically associate with grief and loss. But losses of many types can also generate powerful grief reactions. We include here broken relationships, loss of a pet and loss of employment. When the loss experience strikes we immediately want relief and begin seeking some kind of recovery help. We now understand that losing a loved one is only one aspect of grief and loss. Relationship breakups, divorce, loss of the family pet, getting fired and losing a business are all causes that generate the grief and loss experience. Such losses are rarely associated with the main grieving category, but in fact, they do share many common denominators as the primary experience of death of a loved one. **End Summary** Topics: grief and loss]]> grief and bereavement]]> grief recovery]]> grief]]>]]> About the Author: ]]> Maurice Turmel PhD is a veteran grief and loss therapist with 25 years experience. He is the author of "How to Cope with Grief and Loss" audio ebook that has helped numerous individuals with their grief and loss recovery. Visit the highlighted link for more information.

Grief Recovery Stages Summary

Wed, 20 May 2009 00:00:00 -0400

The stages of Death and Dying evolved by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross are often mis-identified as The Stages of Grief Recovery. In her schema, she came up with 1) denial, 2) anger, 3) bargaining, 4) depression and 5) acceptance as reactions to a diagnosis of terminal illness. Her stages only make sense when considered against that backdrop. As such, this configuration has nothing to do with the stages of grief recovery. Looking back over my 25 years of therapeutic experience dealing with hundreds of individuals and families going through grief and loss and a review of the currently available data I have come up with 4 stages of Grief Recovery. Kubler-Ross' stages do not fit this paradigm even though they are often mistaken as the quintessential guideline. For those of you seeking grief recovery the following stages are what you can expect. Stage 1) Shock and Numbness - This is what we experience immediately after the news of the death of a loved one. Disorientation enters our consciousness and we find we cannot think our way through previously simple challenges. This is a common experience for most individuals experiencing a sudden loss. **End Summary** Topics: grief recovery stages]]> grief stages]]> stages of grief]]> grief]]>]]> About the Author: ]]> Dr Maurice Turmel is a veteran therapist with 25 years experiencewho provided counseling and grief recovery therapy to individuals and families. Combining this work experience with his poetric flair, Dr Moe evolved "How to Cope with Grief and Loss" a grief recovery resource, that focuses on both the emotional and mental aspects of successful grief recovery .

Bereavement Help Audio Ebook

Sat, 09 May 2009 00:00:00 -0400

My name is Maurice Turmel, also known as 'Dr Moe.' I am the author of 'How to Cope with Grief and Loss ' Bereavement Audio Ebook.' There are many products on the web today offering programs and strategies for dealing with grief, loss and bereavement. This audio ebook is one of them, but stands out in a very significant way. Over my 25 years of professional practice I learned that grieving individuals had the hardest time dealing with their feelings of loss and the ensuing emotions that would come rushing to the fore. It's true that grief, loss and bereavement are difficult experiences to transcend. But it is not true that this has to be an overwhelming and debilitating experience. It only seems so because so few of us are well versed in dealing with these effects. In my first year of practice I interned at a Cancer Hospital where grief, loss and bereavement were on the menu every day. Families came with their sick loved ones to spend their last few days together in a comfortable and supportive environment. Facing the imminence of death was always easier for the person dying. **End Summary** Topics: bereavement. bereavement help]]> grief recovery book]]>]]> About the Author: ]]> Maurice Turmel holds a PhD degree in Counseling Psychology, along with a Masters and Honors B.A. in Psychology. He was a practicing therapist for nearly 25 years providing counseling and therapy to individuals, families, and organizations. He is the author of The Voice ' A Metaphor for Personal Development, and the Audio Ebook "How to Cope with Grief and Loss." http://www.howtocopewithgriefandloss.com

What is Grief Counselling?

Thu, 02 Apr 2009 00:00:00 -0400

When I was in private practice I saw a lot of individuals who were grieving the loss of a loved one, whether that was a child, a spouse, a parent or a close friend. On a few occasions I saw couples where one of them had been diagnosed with a terminal condition and had less than 6 months to live. These situations were particularly traumatic for the persons involved, especially for the spouse who was not ill. With these couples, we would discuss what was happening and how each of them was dealing with their feelings. The diagnosed partner seemed to have the easier time, having accepted their illness and the eventual fatal consequence. I saw this in my own family with my now departed brother-in-law and my sister. It was always the surviving partner who had the most difficulty. With counselling of any sort, the goal is to LISTEN! Not just the hear the words an individual was speaking, but to identify the Feelings behind them. When I would reflecte back to the individual I always began with sounds like you're feeling sad, angry, scared, anxious, depressed whatever it was they were conveying. **End Summary** Topics: grief counseling]]> grief recovery handbook]]> grieving process]]> ]]>]]> About the Author: ]]> Maurice Turmel holds a PhD degree in Counseling Psychology. He was a practicing therapist for 25 years providing counseling and therapy to families, and organizations. Maurice (AKA Dr Moe) has led seminars in the areas of Creativity, Self-Development, Spiritual & Psychological Awareness and Grief and Loss. He is the author of "How to Cope with Grief and Loss." He has been a guest expert on numerous Talk Shows. http://www.howtocopewithgriefandloss.com/Grief-Counseling.html

How I Deal with Grief and Loss

Wed, 01 Apr 2009 00:00:00 -0400

I've been writing these kinds of stories for about ten years now. I started handing them out to clients in my therapy practice to see how they would react. Their responses were typically positive. Those in grief knew right away how their loss had affected them and they reported finding comfort here in these words. A few years ago, I found out for myself what an impact these stories could have when I went through the grief of losing my mother. That event tossed me into a state where sadness and loss were my main companions. I stayed there for many months. Re-reading the stories and reflections brought me hope. They provided comfort when I turned to them. I was reminded that my gift for writing had come from above, that these stories had arrived via "cosmic e-mail," and they could benefit anyone, including myself. At first, I couldn't understand why I had been "selected" for this. Then it occurred to me that, to this point, this had been my life theme. **End Summary** Topics: grief recovery]]> bereavement]]> coping with grief]]> grieving]]>]]> About the Author: ]]> Maurice Turmel holds a PhD in Counseling Psychology. He was a practicing therapist for 25 years providing counseling and therapy to individuals, families and groups. He is the author of "The Voice - A Metaphor for Personal Development" and "How to Cope with Grief and Loss - Support, Guidance and Direction for Your Healing Journey". He has been a guest on National and Regional Talk Shows dealing with Grief, Loss and Bereavement. Websites: http://www.howtocopewithgriefandloss.com

The Real Stages of Grieving

Wed, 01 Apr 2009 00:00:00 -0400

When people pose questions about the Stages of Grief Recovery they are often referred to Elizabeth Kubler-Ross' Stages of Death. Her research showed what individuals would go through when receiving a "death sentence" from their doctor. In other words, they had a terminal condition and they were just given so many weeks or months, or perhaps years to live. Then they would go through 1) Denial; 2) Anger; 3) Bargaining; 4) Depression; and 5) Acceptance. In the media and on the net, these stages are often related to the grieving process which is completely wrong. The Canadian Mental Health Association offers the following description of the Stages of Grieving which are in fact very accurate from this writer's point of view. Someone did their homework here and cleared up a very important state of confusion. Here then are the Stages of Grieving - See if they don't relate to what your are going through right now. Stages of Grieving - Canadian Mental Health Association The death of someone close to us is one of life's most stressful events. We fear loss of companionship and the changes it will bring to our lives. **End Summary** Topics: stages of grief]]> grief stages]]> 5 stages of grief]]> grieving]]>]]> About the Author: ]]> Maurice Turmel holds a PhD in Counseling Psychology. He was a practicing therapist for 25 years providing counseling and therapy to individuals and families. He is the author of "The Voice - A Metaphor for Personal Development" and "How to Cope with Grief and Loss - Support, Guidance and Direction for Your Healing Journey". He has been a guest on National and Regional Talk Shows dealing with Grief and Loss. http://www.howtocopewithgriefandloss.com

How to Cope with Bereavement

Wed, 01 Apr 2009 00:00:00 -0400

Bereavement Help: The experience of bereavement is where you come to after the loss of a loved one has begun to work its way through your emotional landscape. Bereavement Help is about choosing resources to help you heal and recover from this emotional trauma. You will feel lost for a time. This person who has passed on and left your world represented something important to you. You not only lost them, but a part of yourself as well. Bereavement Help is what you need now to assist you in facing these difficulties, this being essential to your healing. Bereavement Help in the form of counseling focuses on this aspect of loss where your emotions are in a heightened state and your mental acuity is low. Depression emerges here, because it is the main consequence associated with loss. But so can anxiety and other uncomfortable feelings. The initial stages often include trauma and confusion which are completely normal given the circumstances. Depression, anxiety and feelings of loss come along later and they will be the focus of your grief recovery. If you need medication, see your family doctor and she or he will help you with that. **End Summary** Topics: grief bereavement]]> bereavement]]> bereavement grief]]> grieving]]>]]> About the Author: ]]> Maurice Turmel holds a PhD in Counseling Psychology. He was a practicing therapist for 25 years providing counseling and therapy to individuals and families. He is the author of "The Voice - A Metaphor for Personal Development" and "How to Cope with Grief and Loss - Support, Guidance and Direction for Your Healing Journey". He has been a guest on National and Regional Talk Shows dealing with Bereavement. http://www.howtocopewithgriefandloss.com

How to Cope with a Relationship Breakup

Wed, 01 Apr 2009 00:00:00 -0400

Breaking up with your lover, partner or spouse is a major event in your life. The consequences are not much different than losing a loved one through death. A relationship breakup is a death of sorts, the death of possibilities, a future together and plans that were spun around during your better days together. Feelings of loss, sadness and grief are common to the experience. What you go through is a period of mourning and bereavement over the death of possibilities. The "Us" that constituted your relationship has suffered a fatal blow. As with any instance of loss we feel bewildered and confused. If you're the one who initiated the breakup then you have feelings of guilt to deal with. You've noticed a change in your feelings toward your partner or spouse. You've been feeling more and more estranged from them. You've started to dream about a life on your own, or with someone else. You feel guilty because you know your partner will be hurt. You've already been grieving this relationship for some time prior to informing your partner of your decision. If you're the one who has been left, then you are feeling rejected and lost. **End Summary** Topics: death of partner]]> relationship breakup]]> relationship grief]]>]]> About the Author: ]]> Maurice Turmel holds a PhD in Counseling Psychology. He was a practicing therapist for 25 years providing counseling and therapy to individuals and families. He is the author of "The Voice - A Metaphor for Personal Development" and "How to Cope with Grief and Loss - Support, Guidance and Direction for Your Healing Journey". He has been a guest on National and Regional Talk Shows dealing with Grief and Loss. http://www.howtocopewithgriefandloss.com/Relationship-Grief.html

How to Deal with Suicide Grief

Wed, 01 Apr 2009 00:00:00 -0400

Death due to suicide is probably the most complex grieving experience we ever have to deal with. When a loved one commits suicide we are left wondering Why? Over and over that simple question just keeps coming up - Why? Why would someone we love do that to themselves? What was going on in their mind that this was their only way out? Did I miss something in their behavior that could have warned me of this possibility? I feel lost and confused, and maybe even guilty. I cannot accept that a person I thought I knew would do this. These are the common questions and effects of suicide grief. The questions and confusing thoughts keep coming because, like everything else in life, we want desperately to understand Why? Why? Why? Why? We are in shock. We are dumbstruck. We are broken by the news. Someone we know and love has killed him or herself. Our child has killed him or herself. Our son, our daughter, our friend, our parent, our partner, our lover, our brother, our sister, our cousin, our high school buddy, our girlfriend, our boyfriend has taken their own life. **End Summary** Topics: grief suicide]]> suicide depression]]> suicide grief help]]> grief]]>]]> About the Author: ]]> Maurice Turmel holds a PhD in Counseling Psychology. He was a practicing therapist for 25 years providing counseling and therapy to individuals and families. He is the author of "The Voice - A Metaphor for Personal Development" and "How to Cope with Grief and Loss - Support, Guidance and Direction for Your Healing Journey". He has been a guest on National and Regional Talk Shows dealing with Grief and Loss. http://howtocopewithgriefandloss.com/Suicide-Grief.html

How to Deal with Murder Grief

Wed, 01 Apr 2009 00:00:00 -0400

Murder grief may be somewhat less difficult to deal with than suicide grief, simply because the answer to "why" always points to a third party rather than the deceased individual. Otherwise, the difference is akin to being hit in the head with a 5 pound sledge as opposed to a 10 pound sledge. Either of these will cause a lot of damage. The question of "why", in this case, leads us to try and understand the killer's motivation which rarely delivers a satisfactory answer. Murder has its own attendant shock response when we first hear about it. The event is sudden, unexpected and horrifying. What only happens on television has now struck home for family survivors. It all seems surreal. In the early stages the news seems unbelievable. How could it happen that someone we love has been killed by another person? For these and other reasons, murder grief presents its own level of difficulties to be overcome. Like a car accident resulting in death, the reality of murder delivers a powerful blow to surviving loved ones. It knocks us to our knees and leaves us baffled. Who would do such a thing to someone we love? **End Summary** Topics: murder grief]]> grieving murder]]> grief after murder]]> grieving]]>]]> About the Author: ]]> Maurice Turmel holds a PhD in Counseling Psychology. He was a practicing therapist for 25 years providing counseling and therapy to individuals and families. He is the author of "The Voice - A Metaphor for Personal Development" and "How to Cope with Grief and Loss - Support, Guidance and Direction for Your Healing Journey". He has been a guest on National and Regional talk shows dealing with Grief and Loss. http://www.howtocopewithgriefandloss.com/Murder-Grief.html

How to Cope with the Death of Your Spouse

Wed, 01 Apr 2009 00:00:00 -0400

Losing a spouse is a devastating experience. Our friend, our partner, our soul mate is now gone and we are lost. It feels as if a part of us has died as well. In my practice, helping individuals deal with the loss of their partner was a common occurrence. Young or old, surviving spouses had an equally difficult time adjusting to this reality. Older couples had usually talked about losing one another and had some inkling of how this would affect them. Younger individuals were never prepared, unless their deceased loved one was involved in some dangerous kind of occupation. In a few cases, couples came to see me when one of them had recently received a terminal diagnosis and had only months left to live. In my family, my dad lost our mother when she turned 75. They had over 50 years of marriage together during which her health had often been in question. We had all been forewarned of this eventuality. Despite that, my father went through a rough few years after her passing. He was hurt and angry and showed his feelings in extreme ways. He withdrew from his usual activities and grew sullen. **End Summary** Topics: ]]>]]> About the Author: ]]> Maurice Turmel holds a PhD in Counseling Psychology. He was a practicing therapist for 25 years providing counseling and therapy to individuals, groups, organizations and families. He is the author of "The Voice - A Metaphor for Personal Development" and "How to Cope with Grief and Loss - Support, Guidance and Direction for Your Healing Journey". He has been a guest on National and Regional talk shows dealing with Grief and Loss. http://www.howtocopewithgriefandloss.com/Grieving-A-Spouse.html

How to Cope with the Death of a Child

Wed, 01 Apr 2009 00:00:00 -0400

Losing a child is one of life's biggest tragedies. All that promise, all those hopes, all those possibilities for a bright and successful future disappear in an instant. Whether you've lost a young child or a young adult child, the feeling of loss cuts deep. We are simply not programmed to deal with the death of a child. We accept the loss of parents and grandparents as inevitable. But losing a child, that's never something we expect to deal with. We bring children into the world with great hopes for their future. We imbue them with all kinds of possibilities, like education, marriage and career success. We look forward to these events as a series of experiences we will celebrate and enjoy. Never are we prepared to have our child taken away by some brutal accident, war, murder or suicide. None of these enter our mind until something tragic actually happens. When confronted with this type of loss, we are shaken to our very core. The experience of losing a child unnerves us. All of a sudden the world we thought we knew is no longer safe. Our remaining children are not safe. **End Summary** Topics: death of a child]]> death of daughter]]> death of son]]> grieving]]>]]> About the Author: ]]> Maurice Turmel holds a PhD in Counseling Psychology. He was a practicing therapist for 25 years providing counseling and therapy to individuals and families. He is the author of "The Voice - A Metaphor for Personal Development" and "How to Cope with Grief and Loss - Support, Guidance and Direction for Your Healing Journey". He has been a guest on National and Regional television and radio talk shows dealing with Grief and Loss. http://www.howtocopewithgriefandloss.com/Grieving-A-Child.html

How to Cope with Death of a Parent

Wed, 01 Apr 2009 00:00:00 -0400

Losing a parent is something we all have to face at some point in our lives. At a young age this is particularly difficult, so we rely on adults to show us how to grieve. Sadly, most adults are poor models of the grieving process as a whole. When we lose a parent in our adult years we are facing a changing of the guard so to speak. The older generation is leaving which leaves us without a buffer to our own eventual demise. We may have just lost our last surviving parent, or we may be facing our first loss which means we will have a surviving parent to look after. I lost my mother in 1999. She was 75 years old and had a heart condition. She was facing her third heart surgery since turning age 50. This one was aimed at solving heart valve malfunctions that affected her energy and breathing. During surgery she had a heart attack and went into a coma. She was put on life support while we were being notified and asked to consider some possible options. **End Summary** Topics: death of a parent]]> death of father]]> death of mother]]> grief]]>]]> About the Author: ]]> Maurice Turmel holds a PhD in Counseling Psychology. He was a practicing therapist for 25 years providing counseling and therapy to individuals and families. He is the author of "The Voice - A Metaphor for Personal Development" and "How to Cope with Grief and Loss - Support, Guidance and Direction for Your Healing Journey". He has been a guest on numerous National and Regional Talk Shows dealing with Grief and Loss. http://www.howtocopewithgriefandloss.com/Grieving-A-Parent.html