Articles by Neil Long on ArticleSnatch.com

Get Your Ex Back After A Break Up

Thu, 05 Mar 2009 00:00:00 -0500

A lot of people loose out on relationships by doing the wrong things after a breakup--even when the relationship can still be salvaged! Here are a few dos and don'ts that will help keep you sane--and help get your ex back. Don't sit around feeling sorry for yourself. Nothing is less attractive than a person who sits around feeling sorry for themselves. And it's not just when you sit around, that you'll seem unattractive. It'll affect your demeanor throughout the day. It will show in everything you do, everything you say, and in how you hold yourself. Not to mention, it'll just make you feel like crap! Do think about what your ex said about why he or she broke up with you. This is one of the hardest things to genuinely do after a breakup. It's also one of the most important. You've probably heard the saying, "If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got." This applies to relationships as it does anything else. As much as it may pain your ego to do so, really give some thought to what your ex said to your during your break up. **End Summary** Topics: getting ex back]]> how to get your ex back]]> ex back]]> my ex back]]> your ex back]]>]]> About the Author: ]]> Would you like a better, sexier and more fun relationship? Grab a free audio at http://www.better-relationship.co.uk

Get Back With An Ex

Thu, 05 Mar 2009 00:00:00 -0500

It can be tough to know how to get back with an ex. There are a few people who do have some really good advice on how to do this. But you should also listen to people like me, who've learned form experience what NOT to do. Here are a few things I wish I didn't know. Don't try and convince your ex that you're the love of his/her life. The time right after you've been dumped is NOT the time to try and change your ex's mind! When you try and change their mind from one thing to another, you might as well come out and say, "I am right and you are wrong. Why don't you think my way instead!" Do you think that the person who just broke up with you is going to listen to you tell them how wrong they are? Not likely. You'll make a lot more progress if you focus on something you both agree on. Fighting--or at least disagreeing--is likely what got you here in the first place. But finding common ground is the first step in the mending process. **End Summary** Topics: getting ex back]]> how to get your ex back]]> ex back]]> my ex back]]> your ex back]]>]]> About the Author: ]]> Would you like a better, sexier and more fun relationship? Grab a free audio at http://www.better-relationship.co.uk

Chance to Get My Ex Back

Wed, 04 Mar 2009 00:00:00 -0500

I was devastated when she dumped me. So I decided I would get her back--at any cost! And by doing so, I nearly obliterated my chances to get my ex back. Fortunately, I was able to turn it around in the nick of time. What did I do that nearly cost me the best relationship of my life? I moped. This wasn't just because I was feeling down. I genuinely believed that if my ex could see how much this break up really hurt me, they would understand how much I cared. Seeing this, they would want to get back with me--right? But I couldn't have been more wrong! Moping is *not* an attractive behavior! This is as true for women as it is for men. People want to be around other people who are happy, healthy, and fun to be around. Mopers aren't happy, they don't appear healthy, and they're just no fun to be around! (There are a few people out there who will be attracted to moping. But these are psychological predators of the worst sort, and you should stay away from them!) --make sure this goes in package-- I spied. **End Summary** Topics: exback]]> howtogetyourexback]]> gettingyourexback]]> myexback]]> yourexback]]>]]> About the Author: ]]> Would you like a better, sexier and more fun relationship? Grab a free audio at http://www.better-relationship.co.uk

Winning Your Ex Back

Wed, 04 Mar 2009 00:00:00 -0500

Dealing with a break up is hard on everybody--even the person who did the breaking up! Sometimes they have second thoughts. And sometimes they just broke up because things were bad and they didn't know what else to do. These are the kinds of break ups where you have the best chance for winning your ex back. How can you tell if your "broken" relationship fits into this category? They're not dating anyone else--yet. The fact that they're not ready to date yet, means that you were special to them (But if they ARE dating again, don't despair--it could just mean that that's the way they handle things.) It also means that they weren't running around on you, cheating behind your back. Aside from making you feel good that they weren't doing this--it means they haven't formed a relationship already. And if they are dating, are they just dating one person? This could mean they were cheating...or that they have a friend...or that they have found someone in a similar situation, who keeps them company. In any of those cases, you may still might have a chance of winning your ex back. **End Summary** Topics: exback]]> howtogetyourexback]]> gettingyourexback]]> myexback]]> yourexback]]>]]> About the Author: ]]> Would you like a better, sexier and more fun relationship? Grab a free audio at http://www.better-relationship.co.uk

How to Stop a Breakup

Wed, 04 Mar 2009 00:00:00 -0500

All too often, relationships end for preventable reasons. Just because you and your mate might be headed for separation, doesn't mean that it's not meant to be. It may just mean that you're missing out on something. Just pay attention to what's wrong, learn how to fix it, and you'll know how to stop a break up! Lack of communication. Don't let anybody tell you that the number one reason for divorce is money troubles: it's all about communication. There are two major mistakes most people make with communication. The first is that we often don't really listen to what the other person is saying. We're too busy thinking about what we want. We often listen to what someone is saying, just enough to try and get them to change their mind about it. This kind of mistake is most commonly made by women--but women aren't entirely immune to this! This second major mistake is that many of us hold things in when we want to tell our partner about them. There are many people who've gotten back with their exes after finding out how the ex had REALLY felt, or what they'd thought. "If I'd only known... **End Summary** Topics: exback]]> howtogetyourexback]]> gettingyourexback]]> myexback]]> yourexback]]>]]> About the Author: ]]> Would you like a better, sexier and more fun relationship? Grab a free audio at http://www.better-relationship.co.uk

I Want My Ex Back

Wed, 04 Mar 2009 00:00:00 -0500

"I don't want somebody new--I want my ex back!" Plenty of us have said this very same thing when a well-meaning friend advises us to start dating soon after a break up. Stay busy with your life. Forget, for a minute, that you have things you actually want to accomplish and/or maintain in your life. Forget that we all have a need to keep our lives in order, to keep if from stagnating. Right now, staying busy with your life will help keep you from going absolutely nuts! It's easy to sit around feeling sorry for yourself after you've been dumped. And there's nothing less fun--nor less attractive--than sitting around feeling sorry for yourself. Staying busy with your life has the doubly positive effect of helping you feel good about yourself AND remain attractive. Get some kind of exercise. You wouldn't think that half an hour of exercise can lift that fog of depression you've been feeling ever since your break up. And while it might not make things seem 100% okay, it can definitely lift that air of hopelessness that's been hanging around. **End Summary** Topics: exback]]> howtogetyourexback]]> gettingyourexback]]> myexback]]> yourexback]]>]]> About the Author: ]]> Would you like a better, sexier and more fun relationship? Grab a free audio at http://www.better-relationship.co.uk

Good Relationships-Speaking Your Truth to Your Partner

Thu, 19 Feb 2009 00:00:00 -0500

Mark sought my help because he was thinking of leaving his wife, Linda. He had not been feeling in love with Linda for a long time, but they had two children and he really didn't want to break up the family. "Mark," I asked, "Were you ever in love with Linda?" "Yes, at the beginning of our relationship." "Then what happened?" "Linda seemed to get really insecure once I started my new business and had long work days. Even though I think I gave her a lot of attention on the weekends, she started getting angry pretty much every day. Then after our son was born, she seemed even more unhappy and irritable. She gets mean when she's angry and I just don't find that appealing. I don't feel close to her anymore." "Have you said anything to her about this?" I asked. "No," he replied. "She already seems so unhappy. I don't want to hurt her feelings." "So how do you handle it?" "I guess I just sort of shut down and pretend that everything is okay. **End Summary** Topics: Relationships Advice]]> Good Relationships]]> Love Relationship]]> Better Relationship]]> Relationship Problems]]>]]> About the Author: ]]> Would you like a better, sexier and more fun relationship? Grab a free audio at http://www.goodrelationships.co.uk

Relationships Advice-7 Ways To Improve Your Relationship

Thu, 19 Feb 2009 00:00:00 -0500

Good relationships don't just happen. I've heard many of my clients state that, "If I have to work at it, then it's not the right relationship." This is not a true statement, any more than it's true that you don't have to work at good physical health through exercise, eating well, and stress reduction. I've discovered, in the 35 years that I've been counseling couples, 7 choices you can make that will not only improve your relationship, but can turn a failing relationship into a successful one. TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOURSELF This is the most important choice you can make to improve your relationship. This means that you learn how to take responsibility for your own feelings and needs. This means that instead of trying to get your partner to make you feel happy and secure, you learn how to do this for yourself through your own thoughts and actions. This means learning to treat yourself with kindness, caring, compassion, and acceptance instead of self-judgment. Self-judgment will always make you feel unhappy and insecure, no matter how wonderfully your partner is treating you. **End Summary** Topics: Relationships Advice]]> Good Relationships]]> Love Relationship]]> Better Relationship]]> Relationship Problems]]>]]> About the Author: ]]> Would you like a better, sexier and more fun relationship? Grab a free audio at http://relationships-advice.co.uk

Better Relationshp-Want To Improve Your Relationship With Your Wife?

Thu, 19 Feb 2009 00:00:00 -0500

Recently, my wife, 7 year old daughter and I decided that since it was such a beautiful, cool, and slightly breezy evening that we would take a blanket outside, spread it out on the lawn with some refreshments, and enjoy the evening reading books. I grabbed a book that I had wanted to finish for a while, strapped on my seatbelt as it were, and got ready for some serious, uninterrupted reading. Except there was one little problem... My wife and daughter grabbed a book they "said" they were going to read together. And for the next hour and a half that we spent on the lawn, they were both up and down, in and out of the house, giggling, laughing, playing, getting this, getting that, teasing each other, and in general, fooling around. If doubt they read 10 lines of text the whole time. Now on my end, I'm wanting to read my book and so I found myself starting to feel a little bit aggravated. My focus was on reading and anything that interrupted me or distracted me from my reading was a nuisance and an irritant. **End Summary** Topics: Relationships Advice]]> Good Relationships]]> Love Relationship]]> Better Relationship]]> Relationship Problems]]>]]> About the Author: ]]> Would you like a better, sexier and more fun relationship? Grab a free audio at http://www.better-relationship.co.uk

Better Relationship-7 Magic Ways...

Thu, 19 Feb 2009 00:00:00 -0500

Better Relationship- Refreshing Your Relationship

Wed, 18 Feb 2009 00:00:00 -0500

A good portion of the enjoyment of a pleasant date is in the anticipation. We have a date for Friday night and we think about it throughout the week. We think about what we will wear, where we will go, what we'll eat, what we will say and do. We plan on how long it will take to get ready and whether we will need to leave work a few minutes early. When we enter a relationship, we stop dating. We see each other, of course, much more than we did in our dating days. At the onset of living together, we still have that sense of anticipation before seeing that beloved face. We hurry home to the most important person in our little world. After years together, we become used to the routine. We may enjoy seeing our significant other as much as ever but the exhilarating anticipation has become normalized. We have become habituated to the lives together we have created. We need to start dating again. We need to create special events that we can look forward to with keen relish. Thinks about when you last took a vacation or a pleasure trip. **End Summary** Topics: better relationship]]> good relationships]]> love relationship]]> relationship advice]]>]]> About the Author: ]]> Would you like a better, sexier and more fun relationship? Grab a free audio at http://www.better-relationship.co.uk

Relationship Problems - How To Keep The Flames Burning In A Relationship

Wed, 18 Feb 2009 00:00:00 -0500

It is true that intimacy and relationship are two very different words. They have different meanings and present totally different concepts. The tie that binds them to each other, however, is the fact that a relationship needs intimacy to survive. Intimacy is the substance which enables the people involved in a relationship to enjoy each other all the more. Intimacy is defined as the condition of being private or personal. This encompasses everything that involves close association or familiarity. Two people are intimate when they are able to share with each other the innermost and most essential parts of themselves without any kind of inhibition. It is only through creating intimacy that two people are able to know each other through and through. The inability of people involved in relationships to create intimacy results to the creation of distance. This is the reason why creating intimacy is important even from the start. How to create intimacy is something that each and every person involved in a relationship should know how to do, for creating intimacy is the foundation that would forge the connection between two people n a relationship more strongly than ever. **End Summary** Topics: Relationships Advice]]> Good Relationships]]> Love Relationship]]> Better Relationship]]> Relationship Problems]]>]]> About the Author: ]]> Would you like a better, sexier and more fun relationship? Grab a free audio at http://www.relationship-problems.co.uk

Relationship Problems - Relationship Deal-Breakers

Wed, 18 Feb 2009 00:00:00 -0500

In the 37 years that I have been counseling couples, I have discovered that there are only a few issues that are true relationship deal-breakers. Many of the issues that tear relationships apart are not actual deal-breakers. Rather, most divorces and breakups are the result of one or both partner's unwillingness to learn from the conflicts that exist in all primary relationships. But some conflicts and differences are actual deal-breakers. HAVING CHILDREN Early in my career as a psychotherapist, I worked with Mary and Cal. Mary and Cal met when Mary was 38 and Cal was 47. Cal had been married before and had two adult children, while Mary had never been married. Cal made it very clear to Mary that he did not, under any circumstances, want more children. Mary seemed to accept this, but secretly hoped to change Cal's mind once they were married. A year after they were married, Mary brought up the issue of having children. Cal was appalled. He felt angry, trapped and betrayed by Mary's secret hope, as well as by her dishonesty. Mary begged and pleaded, hoping Cal's love for her would soften his position. **End Summary** Topics: Relationships Advice]]> Good Relationships]]> Love Relationship]]> Better Relationship]]> Relationship Problems]]>]]> About the Author: ]]> Would you like a better, sexier and more fun relationship? Grab a free audio at http://www.relationship-problems.co.uk

Good Relationships-Refreshing Your Relationship: Set Regular Dates

Mon, 16 Feb 2009 00:00:00 -0500

A good portion of the enjoyment of a pleasant date is in the anticipation. We have a date for Friday night and we think about it throughout the week. We think about what we will wear, where we'll go, what we'll eat, what we'll say and do. We plan on how long it will take to get ready and whether we'll need to leave work a few minutes early. When we enter a relationship, we stop dating. We see each other, of course, much more than we did in our dating days. At the onset of living together, we still have that sense of anticipation before seeing that beloved face. We hurry home to the most important person in our little world. After years together, we become used to the routine. We may enjoy seeing our significant other as much as ever but the exhilarating anticipation has become normalized. We have become habituated to the lives together we have created. We need to start dating again. We need to create special events that we can look forward to with keen relish. Thinks about when you last took a vacation or a pleasure trip. **End Summary** Topics: Relationships Advice]]> Good Relationships]]> Love Relationship]]> Better Relationship]]> Relationship Problems]]>]]> About the Author: ]]> Would you like a better, sexier and more fun relationship? Grab a free audio at http://www.goodrelationships.co.uk