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Why We Get Angry and How To Control Anger

By: Noraini Maskuri

Anger is an emotional distress which must be checked and not allowed to grow into a mighty rage. People have died from the anger of country or group leaders through creation of wars or through acts of terrorism. Marital abuse, child abuse and street fights are some of the effects of anger that have gone out of control.

Usually a person gets angry not out of choice but out of provocation. The challenge here is to disallow provocation to influence our emotion and make us do things that we regret later. If we have a problem in managing our anger, we must learn to control it before it controls us.

What causes anger? Let us identify the triggers before we get to how to control it. When we understand where it is coming from, we will recognize and curb the symptoms.

* Frustration due to obstacles to what we desire or need.

* Pain and discomfort

* Our angry childhood environment

* Personal insult

* Huge ego

How do we control our anger? We cannot control how and when we get angry but we can control and choose what we want to do with our anger. If we know that we fly off the handle easily, there are ways that we can do to manage it.

Expressing anger is not necessarily unhealthy, as long as it is constructive and serves as a warning. When an anger is suppressed over a long period of time, there is a possibility of greater damage when that anger is released eventually. In the society that we live in it is expected of us to suppress or repress our anger so be mindful when you choose to keep something within, you either overcome by forgiving or you let your feelings known calmly.

We can choose to walk away from a volatile situation to give ourselves time to recover and reflect. You will begin to see things in different perspective when you have time to cool off. Why sweat it and use up a lot of energy in this already stressful world?

Go drink a glass of water, as water has healing properties. Go lie down somewhere else and stop focusing on the negative scenario. Stop giving energy to the anger. In some religious belief, anger is the devil itself. It sits right on top of your head and spur you on. Do not give permission for your anger to breed.

To forgive is to forget and it still holds true. It's a simple yet powerful way to release the toxic from your system. Say out loud that no one has the right to offend you without your permission. When you forgive someone, you forgive yourself too.

Try to look at it with a sense of humour. Laughter is indeed the best medicine. Another way is through meditation where you seek peace, clarity and selfempowerment. Or you can release anger by exercising or brisk walking.

Do a self-evaluation and establish what situation makes you angry? If ego is always the cause of you anger, then deal with your ego. Wanting to be right always does not give you the right to be angry. However if you feel it is beyond you to overcome your anger by yourself, get professional help.

There is no issue of shame if what you are doing will help yourself and the people around you.

Anger control is possible once you decide you want to control it and not let it control you. Walk away, reflect , laugh and forgive. If it gets too hard, seek help through medication or alternative healing.


Noraini Maskuri is an advertising veteran, freelance writer, and net business owner. She is passionate about helping women and provides tips and wisdom for women to help themselves through selfempowerment. To subscribe to free newsletter, please drop by at : http://selfempoweredwoman.com

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