After a couple says "I do" in a perfect word, they live happily ever after. Unfortunately, a perfect world we do not live in. And most times, following the wedding day, that is when trouble begins.
Whatever the cause, the couple's happy and blissful relationship all of a sudden turns cold and bitter.
In this article, I am going to draw on my experience as a family counselor in San Diego to help a couple decide, when is it time for a couple to seek marriage counseling.
Disagreements, arguments, and fights happen. It is going to happen in a lot of marriages. But there is a time when the couple needs to look at whether or not this is normal or part of everyday life. Or if is too much and time to seek help.
Because if you leave a problem within the marriage unchecked, this could be the beginning of a horrible divorce.
So for couples seeking to keep their marriage, here are some key signs to look for and decide if marriage counseling is needed.
The first sign is do you guys bicker? Do little things cause you guys to argue? Allthough seemingly no big deal, this could be the beginning of trouble starting.
Second, do you guys find it hard to say anything nice about each other? This shows you that you two are holding contempt for each other and that is not beneficial.
A third issue to look at is do you find the level of respect between the two of you is gone? In every relationship, there has to be respect.
Fourth sign, is there a loss of intimacy with each other? This isn't just talking about sex, although sex is a part of it. Is it more than that where the feeling of closeness isn't there anymore?
Fifth, when your spouse is not around are you happier? This sign is not good and the beginning of a break up.
Sixth thing to examine is there a loss of trust between the two of you? One of the most important things for a married couple is trust. When your most intimate moments are going to be lived and shared with, there has to be trust.
Finally, has there been unfaithfulness between one of you? This seems simple and obvious. But sometimes when this happens, couples could just try to ignore it rather than deal with it.
Of course there are plenty of other signs. But these are some big ones when deciding if it is time to seek a marriage counselor.
If these are some of the things you are experiencing, and to find a way to save your marriage is your goal. You need to seek professional help to try and work out these problems.
Often times, a third viewpoint can help immensely and that is where a family counselor can help.
