The Art Of Conquering Anger Before It Conquers You

The Art Of Conquering Anger Before It Conquers You

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Anger is a killing thing: it kills the man who angers, for each rage leaves him less than he had been before - it takes something from him. Thats how Louis L Amour describes anger. Did you ever feel like yelling or hitting someone? Ive felt that so many times. I dont remember being angry on anyone when I was young. It all happened after Tammy was born. Every mother experiences joy when her baby is born and I was no exception. But after the birth of Tammy suddenly my whole life was changing and I was experiencing a new term called as responsibility in my life. I had to spend sleepless nights feeding her and taking care of her. On one side my health was deteriorating due to lack of sleep and on the other hand I was experiencing pressure from the elders of my family in the form of advices. The worst part was that there was no time for me as an individual and in the time that I had, I used to sit and about the safety of Tammy. That was the period when anger gradually started taking its toll on me.

Usually anger is an emotion which arises out of hostility towards someone who you feel has deliberately done you wrong. Its a normal healthy feeling that we experience, but once it gets out of control thats when it can be a disaster for you and others. The main cause of anger is when someone puts you down, but it can also occur when you brood about your personal problems and feel completely hopeless and out of control. Anger is also constructive. It is a natural response to threats. It inspires powerful, often aggressive, feelings and behaviors, which allow us to fight and to defend ourselves when we are attacked. A certain amount of anger, therefore, is necessary for our survival. When angry, people express, suppress and finally calm down. Some dont know how to release this powerful emotion and they end up losing their temper on the wrong person in the wrong manner. The healthiest way to express anger is to express your angry feelings on the right person assertively.

Some people enjoy a malicious pleasure by making you mad. So how do you deal with such people? Just keep telling yourself that it is even below your dignity to go out and lash at them. Your anger will get composed gradually. Another option is to say nothing while being angry because when we speak harsh words and the other person responds in a similar way it will go on and on. If we treasure our peace of mind more than anger then we wouldnt express it. The act of deep breathing goes a long way in composing yourself. Smiling can also diffuse negative situations. You could also meditate to attain inner peace. Anger, one of the biggest causes of stress, often occurs when a person, institution or life itself does not live up to our attitudes and expectations.

The worst part is that it ruins our present state of mind making our lives even more miserable after expressing such strong emotions. I used to yell at Tammy and my mom. But I realized that at the end of the day I am being robbed of all my joy and the pain of my daughter getting withdrawn from me or being scared of me is even more horrifying than my anger. Thats when I decided to put an end to this emotion of mine by focusing my life onto something else. I realized that I needed a change of atmosphere and it was not really about Tammy or my mom. I vividly remember my cousin Sandra installing a safety device from ADT security systems to get rid of her irate neighbor. At the core of all anger is a need that is not being fulfilled, so try and understand what you really need and enjoy that fulfilling feeling.

About the Author:
I am a freelancer and I have a keen interest for human psychology. In my free time I love to research on human emotions and their relationship with security systems such as ADT Home Security Systems.



Article Originally Published On: http://www.articlesnatch.com


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