Seeing Ourselves Through The Eyes Of Others

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Parenting in front of other people has always made me a little nervous. I worry about what others might think. Especially since having the nerve to call myself a parenting expert really adds the extra pressure!

Many people are self-conscious about their parenting, including me. What if I am being too harsh? What if I am being too lenient? What will other people think? Do other people think my kids are brats? What will others think if I lose my temper in public? If my kid has a tantrum in public, will I know how to handle it? Please, God, do not let him have a tantrum in public! Ugh, the horror of it all!

As parents, we often have to set our egos aside. How we look to others and what we think others might think of us must be secondary to what we need to do to raise our kids to be amazing adults. Seizing the teaching opportunity in each moment is more important than trying to avoid feeling foolish.

The best ways I have found to set my ego aside in those horrific moments, is to take a deep breath and think to myself,

* What is my kid trying to communicate to me? * How can I best teach her the coping mechanisms she needs to get through this?

These thoughts often get me out of, my frustration, my self-consciousness in front of others and my own ego. They put me in a more loving space toward my child.

From your kids point of view, how a family spends its time teaches kids what is important. If you believe in being active and having healthy bodies, then spending the weekends on the couch is not teaching kids to lead an active lifestyle. If you loved hiking before you had kids, take the kids hiking. If you love building things, teach your kids to build. Share your passions and let teaching them your values motivate you to do the right thing, even when you do not feel like it. Remember, your kids are watching!!!

I always tell my clients to be careful how they treat their parents. Are you patient with your elderly parents or grandparents? Remember, in 30 years, you will be that parent and your kids will have learned how to treat you from watching you now. Remember, your kids are watching!!!


Copyright (c) 2011 Bette Alkazian

About the Author:
We need to model our humanness for our kids and to show them how to make
mistakes, how to tolerate the discomfort of living with those mistakes,
and most importantly, how to make things better. The best
modeling involves admitting that we do not have all of the answers and
that we have to employ an expert who can help us.
http://www.balancedparenting.com.



Article Originally Published On: http://www.articlesnatch.com


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