How To Help Your Loved One Get Well

When a loved one or friend is sick and in the hospital, this is a very challenging time, not only for the patients, but loved ones as well. Many people feel helpless as they watch their loved one face the difficult days in the hospital, sickness.
Being admitted to the hospital can be a very stressful and challenging experience. As a physician, Ive observed the disruption illness can bring to the lives of my patients. Often times patients dont know what to do during the hospitalization, and are left with long intervals of time, often resulting in watching television in between hospital staff interactions, diagnostic tests and receiving visitors.
Here are a few tips that can help you to improve your hospital stay and recovery:

1. Make sure to take good care of yourself. Frequently care givers overlook their own health and well-being while taking care of others. This is a very difficult and stressful time for everyone involved. If youre not well rested, not getting your sleep, it is virtually impossible for you to be able to provide the assistance and support your loved one needs. Sometimes this requires difficult choices, but the bottom line remains. You must take care of you first!

2. Encourage and support their decision to get well. While many people focus on wanting to get over their illness, it is crucial to encourage your loved one to focus on whats working. During a hospital stay, many patients tend to focus on not wanting to be sick, rather than getting well. While the difference between the two may seem subtle but it is very important. A focus on health, essentially stimulates the body to improve and to heal. An intention to get well, in very important and measurable ways helps the body.

3. Help them to ignore all dire predictions -Use them as a catalyst, as a challenge to overcome whatever disease you are facing. Despite the odds, others have lived youre your special one can, too! Ive witnessed many patients defy their doctors predictions. Unfortunately, doctors are trained not to give false hope, and often give patients dire predictions that appear to be credible predictions based on statistics involving other patients. Of course such bleak predictions will have a very negative impact on recovery and health.

Many patients have proven to me over the years that we all possess the ability to survive, thrive and overcome seemingly insurmountable odds. Regardless of the diagnosis and prognosis you are facing, please know all is not lost. Men and women like you have faced the challenges of living with and overcoming serious and potentially fatal diseases. These experiences led me to believe that you, too, can get well , too!

Usually predictions are based on statistics that reflect the experience of other people. The will to live, the desire to get well, has a tremendous impact on our bodies and can mean the difference, literally between recovery and illness, health and disease and life and death. They cant accurately predict how long you will live. Remember: ALL STATISTICS ARE ABOUT OTHER PEOPLES EXPERIENCES! AND MAY NOT NECESSARILY PREDICT YOURS UNLESS YOU ALLOW THEM TO BY PUTTING FAITH IN THEM.


4. Help them to become more self-aware, through exploring their secret thoughts and emotions. How do you feel about this experience called disease? Does it create fear, anxiety, denial, and constant thoughts? Thats normal. All of these emotions are a part of the disease process. You can work your way through all of them, with awareness and patience.

Pay attention to your feelings and emotions, honestly allow yourself to experience them. Sometimes youre frightened, anxious, distressed. Also, lonely, pain, fatigues Thats very normal. Acknowledge them

5. Stay informed- With the patients permission, ask the treating physician pertinent questions. Ask about options, second and even third opinions, if the patient isnt comfortable with the doctors recommendations. Write the patients questions down, and act as an advocate. The internet has great health information resources. Use them!

6. Fill your loved ones room with positive things. First and foremost, I believe, one of the healthiest things you can do for your loved one during their hospitalization and recuperation is to turn off the news (any type, unless you just watch the weather)! Encourage them not to watch violent, depressing television programs. If possible, bring photos, blankets, small tokens from home that will help the patient to feel more comfortable. Also, encourage him/her to watch inspiring comedy and educational programs Use the resources that are available to you via the Internet, books, CDs, DVDs, and other formats.

7. Provide your loved one with a good, listening ear, allowing a space to share their thoughts and feelings with a kind person, a good listening ear.
It doesnt matter who that is. A health professional, family member, spouse, friend or someone else can be a great well-being coach, a valuable asset.

8. Help to cultivate optimism. Medical research demonstrates optimists are healthier and recover faster than pessimists. Every crisis can be viewed as an opportunity. Your encouraging words can have a tremendous impact. Help your loved one to see that their cup isnt necessarily half empty, its half full. A pessimistic view can be transformed into one that is more optimistic.

9. Help the patient to relax. This is a very important thing to do. Most illnesses are stress related. When your body is relaxed it has the opportunity to regenerate and heal.

10. Encourage Laughter Laughter is one of the easiest and fastest ways to promote health. During the last 20 years researchers across the globe have identified the positive impact it has on our bodies, especially its ability to reverse the impact of stress on our bodies, a key ingredient to the development of most chronic diseases.