One of the most painful aftermath for a victim of their spouse's emotional affair is none other that the haunting images of their spouse's lover. They're like a horror movie playing endlessly in their mind.
For victims of cheating, there are many reactions to this onslaught of images:
- Restless sleep
- Loss of appetite
- Inability to focus on tasks
- Find it difficult to save the marriage
It's not unusual to carry around these images in your mind, but it is possible to get rid of them. In the next paragraph you will learn 3 steps that will give you the power to stop them from haunting your mind so you are able to regain your normal life while healing your shattered emotions .
Dealing With The Pain of Post-Emotional Affair Pictures
First, I want to assure you that eventually, the power these images hold over your mind will fade. The horror film inside your head will end, and you will move forward.
However, in the early stages--when you have just found out about your spouse's emotional affair--is where it hurt the most. There is no need for you to know any specific details to get the horror movie to start playing. Many victims fill in all the blanks themselves, in heart-rending detail.
The only thing that you are sure of is that your spouse is having an affair, and probably a few other uncertain details. But that is more than enough for you to have those haunting images in your mind such as:
1. A picture of your spouse's lover as being better than yourself in many ways.
2. Both of them hugging, kissing--and more intimate scenarios.
3. The way your spouse admiring their lover, which was never the same onto you.
4. Your spouse treating the other person with more value than you have ever been treated before.
These images are truly haunting, clinging to your mind as they begin taking over your days, infiltrating your dreams at night, and generally making you miserable.
Everything you imagine is apparently a good illustration of every emotions that you are also experiencing, which include fear, distrust and betrayed. The haunting images and the negative emotions start to feed into one another, forming an abuse cycle that will leave you feeling totally drained.
This is the rollercoaster of emotions so many victims of an emotional affair are talking about. Ultimately, this can derail any efforts or strides you've attempted to make to survive the affair and save your marriage. You're simply too drained.
Stop The Haunting Images That Drained Your Emotions
As the cycle of recurring images and negative emotions drain you, you begin to feel more vulnerable and find the images even more difficult to escape. The further down you go, the longer it takes to climb back out.
From wherever you're starting from today, it's going to take a big push on your part to stop the cycle. But remember: it's your mind, and you have the power to manage what goes on there. Below you will find 3 steps that will help you regain the strength to control your mind while exterminating the assault of those haunting images:
Step 1: Put the Haunting Pictures on the Clock
To start the process of regaining the power of your mind, set a specific time in a day and only let the images come to you during this period.. This may not always work, but if an image starts to appear at a time other than what you have scheduled, push it away by reminding yourself that it is not yet the time for haunting images.
What this will do is help you begin to manage when you allow something into your mind, and what is allowed there. It's a subtle shift, but can be very empowering. Think of it as standing up to a bully.
Step 2: In the Designated Time, Allow the Images to Appear
If you have to, think of yourself opening a door and saying "Come on in" to those images. Let the images troop in wearing whatever form they want. You are only temporarily tolerating these unwanted guests, and at the end of the designated time, you can push them back out the door. But not before you have had some fun at their expense.
Step 3: Rewind the Image
Take one of the images, and pretend it's on a movie reel. Replay the whole scene, but start at the end and running it backwards. By playing with the structure of the image, it may help you to feel better-because the image can be manipulated in the way that you want. It will show you that this image has no solid foundation-it's subject to the whim of your mind and what you choose to do with it.
Again, you will need some time to take charge over these haunting images, but the result will help you in the healing process of your shattered emotions.
