Counseling - Keys To Break Away From Controlling And Oppresive Relationships

Counseling - Keys To Break Away From Controlling And Oppresive Relationships

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Controlling relationships are much more common than a lot of people realize, and while they are thought of as unhealthy and bad, the people that go for them do so for rather plausible, albeit harmful reasons.

Like actors in a play, in the majority of controlling relationships you'll find two roles being played out, the controller and the controlled.

A good counselor will tell you that the person who chooses to wed or date the controlling individual is doing so due to one or a mixture of the following factors.

1. Being controlled is what they are used to, what they grew up with, so even though it's not gratifying, it is suprisingly comfortable.

2. They are earnestly trying to overhaul the controlling mate. Usually this is done unconsciously as a way of attempting to fix the unhealthy relationship they had with their guardian or parents.

3. To be in a relationship with a controlling person helps make them look good, because when they assess their own actions against the controller's, they appear to be doing a great job of running their life, despite the fact that they're probably not.

4. To be with a controller appears to make life easier at periods because they don't need to make lots of choices, because that's exactly what the controlling person does. It gives them another person to blame when things don't work out best because they didn't make the choice.

If you're wanting to break free from a controlling dating or marriage relationship, here's a few points to consider.

In case you are attempting to reform a controller...make sure you stop. There isn't any type of action better at creating insanity in a person than wanting to control something you have no control over. The only thing we have control over is ourselves, and if we will spend our time working diligently on our own faults and weak points, we will acquire improved feelings of control over our lives.

Don't hide behind a controller's poor conduct to make yourself appear good, to conceal your shortage of personal initiative and commitment to progress. Discover a reason for living life that delivers joy to you and other people. Do a bit of exploration into your reason for living and discover why you are here on planet earth.

Devote the time and energy required to discover ways to make one's own decisions. To be with a controlling person could be pretty great because they're pleased in making all the decisions. That lets you off the hook, except that you don't ever improve the good habit of making sound decisions. Like any new skill, learning to make good solid decisions, is a talent that becomes better with greater levels of practice.

About the Author:
Chris Keenan is the originator of Easy Relationship Help. They provide an inexpensive alternative to the typical counselor. Their no risk method to relationship assistance makes it easy for individuals to get the relationship counselling support they require. "Why be all alone when you don't have to?"



Article Originally Published On: http://www.articlesnatch.com


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