Cheating Affairs: Discover Why Cheating Affairs Dont Make Sense

Cheating Affairs: Discover Why Cheating Affairs Dont Make Sense

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You should view cheating affairs as a 80 to 20 split. Ask a cheating spouse, if they had a choice, would they want 80% of a good thing, or just 20%?

A reasonable person would want as much of a good thing as possible. But, your marriage could be on the rocks when your spouse is exploring outside of your marriage searching for the 20% he or she feels they are missing.

If you have suspicions that your spouse is thinking about an affair, take the time to share this information with them immediately. If the affair has already happened, this could be the opportunity for you and your spouse to discuss the problems in the relationship. Get them to understand they have risked 80% of your marriage for a measly 20%.

Marriage: A True Partnership
If you have been the victim of a cheating spouse, your first question was probably, Why or How did this happen? You felt that you had given everything there was to give, and are wondering, what's left.

It is very uncommon to find a relationship that can give a person 100% of their needs, all of time.

Yet, many couples take their marriage for granted. Your spouse may feel neglected, not feeling they are a priority on your list. In the mean time, you feel that you are handling everything that has been put on your plate, and your marriage may not be able to receive 100% of your time.

When comparing your friendships: these relationships do not have the pressure or expectations put on them the same as a marriage. Most friendships are fun and games: attending sports events, shopping, or going out for a meal.

A marriage is a true partnership. A relationship with a lot of expectations in addition to the fun.

In maintaining your marriage there must be some negotiation with your spouse. Communication is necessary so both spouses dont lose that 80%, and not be tempted to look for the missing 20%.

The 80/20 ratio is by no means a scientific equation. Its to point out that marriage has more than just an fairy-tale ending. And the ones who think they are neglected, or are missing out on the fun, will try to fill the void by having cheating afairs. But the fun loses it's shine when the affair is discovered.

A cheating spouse usually figures out late in the game that maybe working on that 20% they felt was missing in the marriage is nothing compared to losing 80% of a good thing.

Most cheaters will experience emotional facts because of their actions.

Emotion 1: Guilt

The cheater will (or should) feel guilty. They may convince themself that they had good cause for the affair, but anyone with a conscience and a heart knows that they are wrong or they wouldn't try to hide it.

Emotion 2: Shame

The difference between shame and guilt is that,an act is being committed that would be embarrassing if others were to learn about it. The cheater knows that they will be judged by spouse,family and friends. The cheating spouse knows they are doing something wrong, and they are ashamed of their actions.

Emotion 3: Fear

A cheating spouse knows the risk they are taking. The marital relationship they have built with their spouse,not to mention the love and respect of their family.

They may feel that their life is on a downward spiral, risking the 80% that they already have. They could also feel that they would not be able to recover from their actions now or control them in the future.

Cheating affairs can be a tremendous emotional burden intense pain for the victim, and a source of anxiety and self-accusation for the cheater. To throw away so much for so little, it would be better logic to work on the marriage rather than lose a relationship, looking for what you may think will be the answer to your problems.



About the Author:
Discover Why Cheating Affairs Dont Make Sense
How to Survive Cheating
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