It's that time of year again: The bridal season. If you've been invited to a bridal shower for the first time, here are some ground rules you ought to be aware of.
First and foremost, find out if the mother or the bride or groom will be there, and if a bachelorette party is being planned. Why? Because while it's traditional for the mothers of the wedding couple to invited to the bridal shower, it's not traditional of the mothers of the wedding couple to be invited to the bachelorette party.
Consequently, there's a difference between what you can do -- and what kinds of gifts you can give -- if the mother of the bride or groom are watching. To put it another way, what you wouldn't do with your OWN mother watching, you shouldn't do with anyone else's mother watching! So if they're going to be at the shower, save the rowdy behavior, off-color stories, skimpy lingerie, and "naughty" gifts and games for the bachelorette party.
Also keep in mind that giving a bridal shower gift does not exempt you from giving a wedding gift. If money is tight, pool it with some of the other wedding guests so you can get something worth giving. And while you can give money or a check as a wedding gift, under no circumstances should you give it as a bridal shower gift. Give a gift card if you have no other ideas -- it will show you've made an effort to care, and if its from a prominent online retailer, it will save the bride a trip to the mall.
Spending too little for a gift makes you look stingy; spending too much come across as overcompensating. A predictable gift makes you look lazy; a gift that's too unique makes you look pushy. Twenty five to seventy five US dollars is a respectable price range.
But even the best planned bridal shower gift idea won't go over well if it's not well packaged. Don't settle for the cheapest wrapping paper and ribbons. And if you aren't any good at wrapping presents, get help from either a friend or the store. Failing that, you can get a colorful shopping bag. And enclose a card so that the bridesmaids can keep track of who gave what for the bride's thank-you cards.
There's a bridal shower gift idea you can download, print out, and put in a pretty binder right now: 1000 Questions For Couples by Michael Webb, a veteran relationship counselor with hundreds of media appearances, more than fifteen books, and a wife of twenty years to his credit. It gives the wedding couple both serious and fun questions about love they can ask each other, and as a bonus, you also get a copy of The Newlywed's Guide To A Successful Marriage! You can order it from
http://myquestionsaboutlove.com/1000-questions-for-couples-quiz-book.
