Are You Uneasy About Getting Burned?

Are You Uneasy About Getting Burned?

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Well, so am I. And it isn't a good feeling.

All people has had occasions when their goodwill and hard work were exploited. It's all too easy to become quite defensive after such experiences. After all, none of us likes to feel like a fool.

However , defensiveness can become quite problematic, within both personal AND business interactions. It's referred to as pre-judging. In plain english, prejudice. Prejudice and defensiveness may cause us to jump to conclusions and assume that the other person plans to hurt us in the same manner in which other folks have damaged us in the past.

In fact it is good for us to learn from past mistakes and misjudgments. Where we get into problems is when we swing too far to the "other side," from being too trusting as well as being unaware of human nature and behavior, to being too skeptical, uptight, and prejudiced.

The answer lies within three parts:

1. Educate your self about human nature and habits.

There are a lot of good books and lessons readily available that educate regarding human instinct and working with people effectively. One of the first that is ALWAYS proposed as being a primary starting point is the timeless Dale Carnegie book, How To Win Friends and Influence People.

One of the very best courses out there, that shows how your behavior and your associations have an effect on your selling, is Alpha Networker. This program has been backed and advertised by many of the most important names in online advertising and marketing, such as Mike Dillard.

The more you learn about human tendencies, the more comfortable you will definitely feel about your capability to size people up and prevent being taken advantage of. Your knowledge will spare you problems, and your self-confidence will pull men and women to you.

2. Consider how well you already know this individual, and exactly how much damage they're able to do to you.

Different individuals we are around are in distinct positions of influence in our existence. And a number of people we have a good deal of exposure to, as opposed to other men and women we scarcely know, if at all. All must be dealt with based with both how well we know them As well as how much damage they could potentially, logically do to us. (I am not speaking with regards to whether or not these people are devil-possessed or secretly a mass murderer. For our objectives here, we have to be concerned in what is more possible and possible.)

On one hand,a person walking downtown, or a new prospect on the telephone, is not able to do us any real harm. We also are not familiar with them very well, if at all. If we are wise, we will realize that it is ineffective to jump to conclusions about strangers, and it is in addition most likely very damaging to behave suspiciously and adversely toward someone that could in time turn out to be a true ally, either in our private lives or our businesses. When working with these people, books like How To Win Friends And Influence People, and courses similar to Alpha Networker, shall be considerably more beneficial, since they address these types of associations.

On the other hand there are the persons with whom we have had a lot of working experience, and also who are close to us and could do much injury. Because of the potential harm, these people really should be examined much more closely. It's important to nonetheless give them the benefit of the doubt, within reason, however it is also much more important to monitor patterns of behavior and to counteract their ability to do us harm if it seems probable that these people are intending to cause problems. Books such as The 48 Laws of Power and The 33 Strategies of War are going to be a little more clear-cut regarding dealing with the folks that can damage you the most. They are also relatively raw and ruthless, and the techniques they advocate must be utilised with extreme care, and generally only as a last measure. Bear in mind, people can always burn bridges at a later date. It's a lot more challenging and costly to build them back again.

For the men and women in between these two extremes, we should remember to evaluate first exactly how much damage they could do us. We must never forget this. BUT we must in addition try to remember exactly how well we do or do not know these folks. To really understand an individual may take decades of a close working relationship, and even then the individuals we feel we know may surprise us. It's always far better to give someone the benefit of the doubt than to prejudge and burn an expensive bridge.

3. Accept the fact that you WILL make mistakes and you WILL get burned... and the the possibility WILL have been worth it.

Last but not least, you must keep in mind that you WILL get burned. It can not be prevented. You get some things wrong in your business judgments. You get some things wrong in how you handle your personal life. How could you expect to not make a few mistakes with human relationships also??

The critical point to look at is that the risk makes it worth while. We normally learn our most effective lessons by getting burned. It makes a marked impression. It alters your thinking quickly and drastically.

And after all, you can't win if you do not play.


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